Divorce mediation is really about you, your ex-spouse and what’s best for you and your children. In mediation, both you and your ex-spouse meet with an impartial third party, the mediator; with their input, you work through all the key issues you must resolve and then, with their help, make your divorce as amicable and cost-effective as possible.
Divorcing can be a very difficult time for everyone involved. Many times we feel as if our lives are spinning out of control, wondering what’s next and what our ex will think. But divorce mediation can offer you a third person perspective on how to get through this process and can help you make sure everything goes well.
When deciding between divorce mediation and going it alone, it’s important that you consider what alternatives are open to you before you make any final decisions. The two biggest decisions you’ll have to make are whether you want to try to work things out without the help of an outside source, or if you want to seek outside help. It’s entirely up to you.
It’s worth remembering that divorce mediation isn’t necessarily the right choice for every situation. If you have children, it’s always best to seek help from professionals who know what they’re doing. If you are planning to move house or are in a bad financial position, it might be better to get independent legal advice. But if you’re still in love, there’s no reason why you couldn’t have a positive effect on your relationship.
If you’re thinking about going it alone, then take some time to reflect on what you’ve learned throughout the process. You may realise that your ex really doesn’t want a divorce and it really would have been cheaper to just walk away. On the other hand, you may have missed out on valuable advice because you haven’t spent enough time learning all you could about your options. In either case, don’t be afraid to ask for further advice if you don’t feel comfortable with the answers you were given.
Once you have all the facts straight and you are happy that you’ve heard everything you needed to, it’s time to move forward. There is a good chance that your ex is going to accept some sort of compromise, even if you weren’t able to reach a total agreement. This will require a bit of patience and determination on your part but it’s worth the effort. at least trying. Remember that, unless you’re really determined, it is highly unlikely that your ex will be as eager to try and get you to accept something less than what you did originally.
Next, you need to plan your day. This might take some time to decide, so be sure you have plenty of time to do all the preparation. And don’t forget to have someone with you at the mediation sessions who can take over if needed and give you practical support during the process.
Most importantly, make sure that you have a strong understanding of the situation and have clearly defined expectations of the outcome. It’s important to communicate your expectations to the mediators and to make sure that they understand your priorities.
After the divorce mediation process has taken place, you’ll have a lot to learn about yourself and what life will be like after divorce. Your perspective on the whole thing will be completely different when you’re ready to start looking forward to your new life and getting out on your own.
Don’t think that your spouse is going to forgive you easily because of the divorce mediation process. Although they might have been able to reach an agreement through mediation, they may be very resistant to the process and find it very difficult to talk with you again. It is likely that you’ll both need to make some changes in your lives and in the way that you interact with each other.
Don’t despair if this doesn’t work. Divorce mediation will often result in a long lasting and successful ending to a troubled relationship, so it is worth trying.